So to a story of engagement….. and how could a proposal be more romantic that at the Eiffel tower? A client of mine flew to Ireland to ask for permission from his girlfriend’s family, they then flew to Paris where he proposed at the Eiffel Tower.
(The answer was a very definite Yes!)

What is Engagement? Well the dictionary provides us with this definition “A mutual promise to marry” Unfortunately it also says “a hostile meeting of opposing forces in the course of war” I guess this could apply a little later down the track!!!

In many cultures, traditions of engagement, betrothal, and other forms of the commitment to marry extends back thousands of years.  Engagement gave the families of the bride and groom and their community, opportunities to voice concerns or objections. On a more positive note they had time to prepare and plan for the wedding. Successful engagements provided a solid spiritual, financial, social, and family foundation for the married couple.

I was going to write about the ‘Rules Of Engagement’ but luckily for us there really doesn’t seem to be anything that we must adhere to.

We no longer have to provide a dowry of cows etc. and the groom does not need to pay a ‘Bride’s Price’. When families arranged marriages, they were trying their best to guarantee their children a pleasant and comfortable life. The bride was expected to bring a “dowry” of money, jewels, animals, or something of substantial value to the marriage. It was provided by the family of the bride and portrayed her perceived worth. On the other hand, the groom paid a “brides price” to her family and promised to faithfully support the bride.  The traditional bridal trousseau, or hope chest, originated in France and came from the French word trousse, meaning bundle.

So many weird and wonderful traditions surround betrothal. Here’s a couple I found that were new to me!

In medieval Brittany, a man wishing to marry left a hawthorn branch at the door of his beloved on the first day of May.  If she returned the branch to his door, his proposal was accepted.  If, instead, he found a cauliflower at her door the next day, he was rejected. In Finland, the bride-to-be was considered “snobbish” if she did not go door-to-door to receive her gifts in a pillowcase. Accompanying her, an elderly married man, carrying an umbrella (for shelter), came along and was given a drink at each door (Lucky him!).  Today, an umbrella is used as a decoration symbolizing “protection”.  This custom can be included in the wedding by having the bridesmaids carry “parasols”.
                      
Historians do not seem to have a clear idea of exactly when the engagement ring became a standard gift to symbolize the promise to wed. The tradition of the future husband giving his intended an engagement ring may have begun in ancient Rome. It is certain that the exchange of rings in the marriage ceremony predates the giving of an engagement ring, and that the customs related to engagement itself also existed long before the engagement ring became the most prevalent custom.

In a variety of pre-Christian religions, simple wreaths of interwoven rushes, or a small ring woven from the hair of the betrothed, were used to represent a future commitment. Tracing history back to the early Roman Empire finger rings called betrothal rings were given by men to their fiancé to indicate their intention to wed. During this period of history rings of gold were not worn – iron was used to make finger rings. Betrothal rings were not set with gemstones.

Later in history gold was used in the construction of betrothal rings. A commonly used design was that of love knots in gold or silver that quite often could be separated. A part was given to the potential bride and groom at the betrothal ceremony. The two parts of the whole were then reunited on the wedding day.

The practice of engraving the inside of the ring became popular in the 16th century. A poesy (simple sentimental statement such as ‘I love you’) was engraved on the outside and inside of posy rings during that period and the practice has endured with the engraving of initials and the engagement date on the inside of the ring.
  
The current tradition of the diamond engagement ring dates back to the 1800’s in Europe and America. Diamonds were at first exceedingly rare, and their hardness, brilliance, and value lent an extravagant air to the act of proposal. As time went on, more diamond veins were discovered and the gem became more widely accessible. Smaller diamonds became relatively affordable even among less wealthy members of society. The diamond industry grew, and marketing such as the "Diamonds are Forever" ad campaign of the DeBeers Company resulted in the diamond being the standard gem for engagement rings. The diamond also has favourable properties in myths and legends. For the couple being married the most important is that the diamond is said to bring loyalty and fidelity.

Times have changed and, although it seems as emotionally important as ever before, today’s engagement traditions are tailored to suit the couple’s tastes, no matter how romantic or radical.  The old rules don’t seem to apply anymore.  A modern couple may even have their own wedding web page for the purpose of updating guests about upcoming plans for the ceremony as well as the personal and professional backgrounds of the couple. Sometimes, the page will include romantic stories about them, including where they met and how they became engaged. 

I’ve tried to find out how many proposals happen at the Eiffel tower but it seems no one is keeping track of the millions of visitors they have there. There are a few celebrity couples who have used the tower for their most romantic proposal. Tom Cruise proposed to Katie Holmes at the Eiffel Tower. Katie received a five carat oval diamond set in rose gold and platinum in a vintage, art deco design with a split shank. Rod Stewart and Penny Lancaster also became engaged there. Penny has a princess cut diamond rumoured to be worth 50,000 pounds. Kate Moss got engaged to Jamie Hince and apparently bought her own engagement ring rumoured to be worth $190,000.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UYF1wTprVps

Now I know they weren’t engaged at the Eiffel tower but this ring deserves a mention. Beyonce Knowles was engaged to Rapper Jay Z and received an 18CT E colour internally flawless emerald cut solitaire and, according to the jeweller Lorraine Schwartz, it is worth $5 million.

I don’t think I can top that for engagement rings so I’ll just leave it there!

My favourite French quote, regarding Champagne:

Madame Lily Bollinger:

“I drink it when I’m happy and when I’m sad.
Sometimes I drink it when I’m alone.
When I have company I consider it obligatory.
I trifle with it if I’m not hungry and I drink it when I am.

Otherwise I never touch it, unless I’m thirsty.